QUEER WIFE

In recent years, as l've delved inward, l've discovered a strong desire to embody the essence of a "traditional" woman. This doesn't imply a transgender identity; rather, l aspire to be a woman on a societal level-engaging in household chores, caring for my husband and children, and dedicating all my energy to the concept of "family."

These perceived societal constraints for modern women strangely align with what I crave. Thus, the initial concept for this film emerged: "I want to experience a day as a dutiful wife, cooking, grocery shopping, practicing yoga-living what I consider a blissful life." Considering my queer identity, I occasionally transform into a drag queen, emphasizing feminine traits in my appearance.

Through this transformation, I engage in dialogue with myself, then with my family, and ultimately with society, as depicted in various segments of the film.

In this film, besides myself, I invited several close friends to "play" the roles of my husband, friends, and my friend's partner.

The intriguing aspect of the film lies in the fact that no scripted lines were given. During our communication, I told them, "I want you to 'play' the version of 'yourself' that you are most satisfied with, your ideal form." Meaning, during the shooting, no one knew what we would talk about. We only set some basic character relationships, leaving the plot open to improvisation.

The day begins with me waking up to cook for my husband, who impatiently eats a few bites and rushes off to work. I start washing dishes, cleaning the house, watching TV, and doing yoga. In the midst of this, I receive a call from my husband saying that friends are coming for dinner. I go to the supermarket, come back, and immediately start preparing dinner without a moment's rest.

When our friends arrived, we sat down and engaged in almost an hour-long conversation. Initially awkward, the four of us harbored our own secrets, but with the opening of a bottle of wine, we gradually opened up.

When friends arrive, we sit down, and for nearly an hour, we engage in a conversation. Initially, there is some awkwardness, but the four of us share hidden struggles in our relationships. With the opening of a bottle of wine, we gradually open up.

What makes our two couples unique is that one appears to be a distinct queer couple but has a very traditional East Asian relationship, while the other looks like a very normal heterosexual couple but has a unique dynamic (with the woman holding absolute control over the family discourse).

Throughout the dinner, we discuss topics such as giving up work to care for the family, whether to have a wedding, encounters at the supermarket, etc. These discussions hide some thought-provoking issues, including the impact of family values on marital relationships and the unattainable wish for me as a queer person to conform to societal expectations of being a "standard" queer person, preventing me from becoming a wife or mother.

In the final scene, I wake up bare-faced, the house empty, and I light candles in an empty room, burying myself in a cake.

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In this film, I want to conduct an experiment, testing the boundaries between "performance art" and "acting." Having studied film directing in my undergraduate years and engaging mostly in performance art, I question whether, in this media-dominated era, the presence of the artist's physical body is still the fundamental criterion for defining performance.

As the film progresses, it becomes increasingly challenging to determine whether Guanqiao YU sitting there, is "performing" or genuinely "dealing" with the situation. However, for now, I categorize this project as a film because I believe that audiovisual language significantly influences the direction of the film. In future creative processes, I may continue to explore this issue.